1. |
GUIDE DOG
00:46
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I have been to the future
and I don’t want to scare you,
but not only were you not there,
they never even knew you.
They didn’t know me either,
I don’t think I want them to.
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine,
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine.
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2. |
Hallowed
09:56
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I was never giving in
I was never giving up
I was never
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
a trick to make the holy stay inside
sirens made a mess of what I found
so I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
so neighbors don’t report what they have heard
even those without belief keep their heads down
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
I’m still here
Sterilized and hoping
That if I am a wound
I’m not the type to ever heal.
I have found
the worst will drag us down
but the best won’t dig us up like we deserve
and I have found
that if you’re gonna drown
it’s best to hold your breath
starting now.
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3. |
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I must be the loser in some ancient war
every newest struggle I’ve never seen before
there must be someone pulling strings that
wants to settle scores
I must be the loser in some ancient war
I must be the loser in some ancient war
I apologize for wearing whatever uniform I wore
I’m sure that someone told me
what I was fighting for
I must be the loser in some ancient war
it would bring me peace
to know why they are coming after me
I must be the loser in some ancient war
otherwise there’s nothing for me to suffer for
and that would mean it’s only me
whose mercy I implore
no, I must be the loser in some ancient war
I must be the loser in some ancient war
shackled to the future and what it has in store
what’s worse than forgetting
who I was before?
I must be the loser in some ancient war
please let me be
the one who wants the most to pay penance is me
I must be the loser in some ancient war
punished for my actions before history hit record
the guilt I’ve carried with me was always
too much to ignore
I must be the loser in some ancient war
I must be the loser in some ancient war
I’ve got white flags and flashbacks and tracks on foreign shores
I must be in the loser in some ancient war
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4. |
Lions' Nest, Flies' Den
04:10
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Tombstones in the basement
Engraved in a cave print
Made to be ancient
Full tilt to the gravedig, dig?
No shame like hands where the face is
Never took sparkling water or faith into foxdens
Miracle antioxidant mixed in poison intoxicants
New Earth, no Occident
Namedrop promising
Filtered through the hymnals baptized in whatever spirit is prominent
Hyacinth
Lifelong aversion to vitamins
Enough undiscovered gold in the soil to blindside Midas with
It’s inspiring
Mired in fireside hideouts and making the best
While I’m trying to tide the vampires by with just enough blood to get by with
I abide it
Sanguine
Nosedive into landfills
Advils for painkills
A killer ascribed to every facet of thought
or facetious quip that you thought
Was keeping the oceans from rising
And making your home another Atlantis
Lions' nest, flies’ den
Fistfulls of cantrips
Live off what you land with
Makeshift paddles and kneedeep battles with mud
and whatever’s keeping the fishes in
Plates are for finishing
Renditions of orchestras scraped by a fork on grandma’s porcelain
Made the most of the meager?
Of course you did.
Doubt for a promising future?
Of course there is.
Cynical offerings given to gods who surely weren’t listening to bolster the fortress with?
I sneer in my sleep, of course I foisted them.
A delicate string of weaponized pearls, too clever by half, first holstered then pointed?
Of course I authored them, those are my children.
What good is a brick except to build a mausoleum
Forget the concussions they sponsored as weapons before this
God knows I did
I got heavy sleep for the eyeless
Unmitigated spats of violence
Makeshift autopsies for fallen pilots
We’re leaving flowers at graves if I can find them
I’ve got a song in my heart
Please get it out
I don’t want to die with it
Please get it out
I don’t want to die with it
Vespa
Got stung in my sleep by a wasp
while I was trying to rest up
Got my best armor on from the chest up
Made to be cautious while people are watching
or they’ll know I messed up
Red bumps for reminders
No peace for the brother’s keepers’ finders-keepers
Peacekeepers like us
So go ahead and weep for us.
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5. |
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Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
Too long.
All the blood.
credits
from WOE.BEGO
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6. |
Ol' Brush Valley (1929)
02:50
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(Alright.)
On down in Ol' Brush Valley
I went there with my gal, she
Left me feelin' lonesome in the end
So now I drown my sorrow
I figure by tomorrow
That you won't find me feelin' for a friend.
Ol' Brush Valley
I wonder what it is about that place,
Ol' Brush Valley,
But since I left I haven't shown my face
It's a disgrace.
On down in Ol' Brush Valley,
I went and I did bury
The one who left me lonesome in the end,
The grave, well, it was shallow
It left me feelin' hallow
With only just one vulture for a friend.
Ol' Brush Valley
I wonder what it is about that place,
Ol' Brush Valley,
They don't know yet they'll never see her face,
Ol' Brush Valley
The cops are getting closer by the day
Ol' Brush Valley,
Oh how I wish that they would go away,
It's a disgrace.
On down in Ol' Brush Valley
'Cause that is where they tailed me,
They dug her up the ground just for the proof,
But now in this jail, son,
I am never lonesome
And I am never waitin' for a roof.
Ol' Brush Valley
I wonder what it is about that place,
Ol' Brush Valley,
But soon enough they'll all forget my face
It's a disgrace.
(That's right.)
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7. |
Why Have I Come Here?
05:48
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I heard there's a rainstorm coming
I heard they won't try to save me
I heard you've been wondering where I've been.
And I heard giving up is enough
But if giving up is about
Why have I come here?
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8. |
Are You So Sure?
04:27
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Are you so sure?
Are you so sure
What it means
To claim my body?
You sound so sure.
You sound so sure,
That you've laid claim to my body,
That you've laid claim to my body
But are you so sure?
Are you so sure
That there's anything
To claim of my body?
How are you so sure?
How are you so sure
That I haven't already
Started decomposing?
How are you so sure?
How are you so sure?
There must be a reason
I can't see yet,
You owe me an explanation.
How are you so sure?
How are you so sure?
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9. |
Hazard
05:46
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It is tempting to give up and throw my hands up
the medicine is gone but the wound persisted
injury has robbed me of my passions
a will to survive is left but weakened
haunting has become and easy action
I sometimes find myself in rooms I do not know
Loneliness has bred a chain reaction
a gear against a gear, the wrong direction locked me here
It’s easy to mistake
the things you say you hate
for a reason to keep moving
thought I point the finger back
at myself, that’s where you’re at
take note before you fall
and learn to wear the dark with love
I have run low on respect for this
I think anyone who still has some
wasn’t paying attention
and while I don’t know what you want
I think I’ll hazard a thought
I don’t have to check the door
To know the other side is burning
who else could that be for?
Keep in mind, a mastermind wouldn’t play their hand this way
I was putting random cards down looking for a lucky break
Bluffing never was my strong suit
coins are snatched away by more capable talons
now I understand I won the beast of burden
a pity prize to get me out the door
I will be riding out without belongings
my back to the town they say good riddance to rubbish
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10. |
GUIDE DOG 2
02:12
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I have been to the future
And I don't wanna scare you
But not only were you not there,
They never even knew you,
They didn't know me either,
I don't think I want them to,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
They printed all of the good news
But I can't break it to you,
Because not only are the words smudged,
They never could include you,
They can't include me either,
I don't think I want them to,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
But I have been a GUIDE DOG
For 75 years now,
And not only am I tired,
I could never lead you,
I couldn't lead me either,
You shouldn't expect me to,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
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11. |
Petroglyphs
10:23
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Photographs
cataracts
all that last
of you
Petroglyphs
Cosmic shift
what I meant
to do
I took you
I took you
to a thousand years of soil
the only place that’s left to go
you won’t resolve
so come and dig a cave with me
connect it to the next
and once we've dug for light
we'll finally get some rest
come and give away with me
the fortunes we were told
a static sensibility
a handshake to grow old
you grow old.
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12. |
Spirit
05:28
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I wanted to awaken the spirit I thought
Was probably a metaphor but what have I got
To lose except baggage that doesn't contain
Anything useful, just worry and shame
So I took to the woods where I thought that I'd find
The truth of the earth and a new piece of mind
And instead of a quick revelation I found
Life that had grown from the death in the ground
And so needing a rest, I sat under a tree
And a spider walked up my leg up to my knee
and I knew that killing it wouldn't be kind
So I put down my finger directly beside it and
It climbed up my finger and into my palm
And I thought I'd be nervous but I kept my calm
And up from my arm further up to my shoulder
It perched and we left towards a valley with boulders
Away from the woods there was a strong wind
And the boulders felt like they had spirits in them
And I started to understand why people that lived
Thousands of years ago did what they did
And I know it's an error to ever ascribe
Wisdom or thought to a creature that size
And I hadn't been eating so I thought maybe that's why
I'd fashioned an animal spiritual guide
and just as I was about to reach out and touch
the lichens that danced on the side of the rocks
a quake from the earth threw me right off my feet
and I regained composure just in time to meet
the eye of the golum I thought was a stone
he rose to a size that was double my own
for maybe an hour we froze where we stood and
then I turned away and went back to the woods
I dropped the spider off where we'd met
and on the way home pondered goals that I'd set
and if this reality was something at all
and if I could have clarity, however small
or if I'm an ant on the side of the road
much too small to ever know what I don't know
when I got to my house I was finally at peace
and I fell in my bed and went straight to sleep
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13. |
Hunter The Bear
04:31
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night’s not prerequisite anymore
I was looking for a lack but here you are
incipient, I stung myself
an insect unaware it’s being crushed just
hoping it can save itself
a terrible disease that you are catching, thanks to me
now anyone who knows anything
is an enemy now
now anyone who knows anything
is no friend to me
now
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14. |
Painted Glass
09:03
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I was hoping you would
ignore the faultlines
and pass over the flags
that say who I am
so I built us a nest
a soft enclosure
I was painted glass
I was born when you were
(so if it hurts I'll know it’s true)
And I would hate to be the one
stuck in past, lost in his tracks
and I would hate to be the one
groveling for a second glance
but I could even rival that
and I have grown so spiteful that
even if I had a bright idea I’d shoot it down
that’s the point, I’m prepared to meet the ground
it’s a normalcy I’m begging you to know
a towering over you
I am full of age, I am coming for you
hoping you are stronger than I’m used to
it was silent death until the silence broke
until the tongue broke through the teeth I know
it was not hard to make myself known
over feet of sediment and soil
so we plant ourselves where we always did
so we’d always be here for it
if I witness much, let me witness this
a terrible idea, I admit
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15. |
Can I Stay Here Awhile?
05:46
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It isn’t just nauseating
what I thought I could get away with?
You’ve already paid your fare
but I still linger here
dragging feet and dragging up
memories
if you’re gonna plead
then plead with me
I’m the one who knows the story
No, I wasn’t humble
But someone bent my neck
Can I stay here awhile?
this is a consolation
a pity to believe
the truth and all that seems
to be
all of that and more
I was marked for removal
before I first set foot through your door
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16. |
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Walking home I am a little tired
you would mistake me for anyone
It was a heavenly body before I was anything
I was feeling heavy about it even before it got a chance to lift me
in a desperate hum
I gave it what it wants (hum)
I was saying
the decline
was coming shortly
I can not predict the future
but I’m not trying
oh I’m not trying
I mean do you really have to wonder
what kind of person gets in so far?
The sky was streaked with anger
across the middle like a scar
and I was living wrong with that
always ready to finish
dispossessed from an ending
I swear is near
It’s a miracle
transcended on the floor
where the dirt is
I am having too much
fun with it
I’m supposed to be serious
spilling out an infection into open wounds
the bark of a tree to cure what ails
I never intended to defend myself
I gave it what it wants and that was it
I gave it what it wants
and that was it.
I mean do you really have to wonder
what kind of person gets in so far?
The sky was streaked with anger
across the middle like a scar
and I was living wrong with that
always ready to finish
dispossessed from an ending
I swear is near
Walking home I am a little tired
you would mistake me for anyone.
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17. |
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Oldbrush Valley
I wonder what it is about that place.
(I wonder what it is
I wonder what it is
On down
on down.)
(On down in Oldbrush Valley
On down in Oldbrush Valley
On down
On down.)
Oldbrush Valley
I wonder what it is about that place.
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18. |
Painted Glass (Reprise)
04:08
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I was hoping you would
Ignore the fault lines
And pass over the flags
That say who I am
Because I built us a nest
A soft enclosure
I was painted glass
I was born when you were.
(So if it hurt's I'll know it's true)
(I was painted glass)
(I was born when you were)
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19. |
GUIDE DOG (Reprise)
03:42
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I have been to the future
And I don't want to scare you
But not only are you not there
They never even knew you
They didn't know me either
I don't think I want them to
It's fine it's fine it's fine
It's fine it's fine it's fine.
It's fine it's fine it's fine
It's fine it's fine it's fine.
(They printed all of the good news
But I can't break it to you,
Because not only are the words smudged,
They never could include you,
They can't include me either,
I don't think I want them to,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine,
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine).
It's fine it's fine it's fine
It's fine it's fine it's fine.
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20. |
Hallowed (Reprise)
05:01
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I was never giving in
I was never giving up
I was never giving in
I was never, I was never
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
a trick to make the holy stay inside
sirens made a mess of what I found so
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
so neighbors don’t report what they have heard
even those without belief keep their heads down
I always favor less-than-hallowed ground
I’m still here
I’m still here
Sterilized and hoping
That if I am a wound
I’m not the type to ever
heal.
credits
from I wonder
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21. |
Cenotaph
05:46
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I was hoping you could give me
a medal for my bravery
the words are getting old
I am learning to build bridges
to address the distance
feet without a home
and if I have to taste the blood under my tongue
I will swallow it for as long
as it takes to pass
and I it means I’ll find a morsel of redress
I will struggle with regret
as long as it will hold
What if we were both lost and I was never found
And you were
Tasked with breaking news and letting down?
I am missing you
Are so much worse, a cenotaph, a barfight in a church
a relief to remedy
but hey it’s never as bad as it seems
the ocean will abate eventually
they cast their nets out graciously
come here.
And I I had to make an educated guess
no one got a decent rest
and no one’s going home tonight
and If I weren’t so preoccupied with this
I’d seek the safety of my nest but
I
want
to
find
you
whole
or
parts
hahahahaha
What if we were both lost and I was never found
And you were
Tasked with breaking news and letting down?
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22. |
Infinitesimality
07:36
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I was fond of telling you
anything that you would tell me to
I can tell where anything is buried
notches in a forked branch
can’t you see
the dowsing is pointing me
collecting underground
filling in and filing out
right into the leaves
obfuscating holes in ground
looking up from the trap that you set
let me out, you cowards, I’m not finished yet
knowing I could find you anywhere
I took a souvenir
and I got out of there
knowing I could find you anywhere
made it easy to forget
who I used to be when I said
what I meant
I thought that once I mourned it would be gone
but I was wrong
it stretches to the forest I came out of
weathered any storm in those trees
comfort from the infinitesimality
that clings to me
now without you
it all falls apart
not above dealing damage myself I
cut them down and piled them up to keep me dry
knowing I could find you anywhere
I took a souvenir
and I got out of there
knowing I could find you anywhere
made it easy to forget
who I used to be when I said
what I meant
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23. |
Put-Me-Down
03:18
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I got tired of
filling voids
with whatever would fit
both the three chords
and the truth
are useless
easily the best
is what it is
a bleeding heart wrapped around a fist
to beat the truth out with
saved times
for deadlines
I’m dead
before
utility abounds
the best get out of here
as a form of put-me-down
so just put me down
if you’re confused
there’s nothing more to do for you
see, the finger’s pointed at myself
so please just get a clue
saved time
for good lives
I can’t
afford
I want
to think that
I was
reluctant
I was
a coward
who pushed on
for hours
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24. |
Permanence
03:47
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I wanted permanence
I was not wrong to want it.
I spent a great deal of time in the forest
chewing off my legs and limping
you might recognize my silhouette
it wasn’t even desperation
I wasn’t trapped
I haven’t quite
discovered what
I’m doing yet
hatefulness, I wonder
how you came to me
(so easily)
I wanted permanence
I was not wrong to want it.
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25. |
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I was hoping I would settle down
there’s peace to be made, hypothetically
I was hoping I would settle down
the fury in my fingers feels like power
and if you knew me
I wouldn’t want to be powerful
I wouldn’t want to be powerful
I can feel it like a charge
hanging in the air
and it stands to reason
not going anywhere
I feel it in the blood
that’s rushing to my head
And if it’s taking over
It cannot be that bad, can it?
Can it be that bad?
Can it be that bad?
I was hoping I could settle down
there’s people to please, they’re focusing on me
I was hoping I would settle down
Holding their attention feels like power
and if you knew me
I wouldn’t want to be powerful
I wouldn’t want to be powerful
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26. |
Wilderness
03:43
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I was in the wilderness
not taking care of myself
no, I am not taking messages
I have built a machine that built a machine
that pulls the cowardice
straight from your mouth
and if what is true is out here
it was never found
by inexperienced hands digging in the ground
I was in the wilderness
not taking care of myself
no, I am not checking messages
Nothing much is out there
I was in the wilderness
not taking care of myself
you can die from exposure, you know?
I have built a machine that built a machine
that pulls the callouses straight from your hands
and if they there were there from digging
for some bitter truth, well ain’t that too bad?
I was in the wilderness
not taking care of myself
no, I am not checking messages
Nothing much is out there
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27. |
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|
The night cast its ballot and I lost
treading through the permafrost
on the endless grey
putting pennies in the slot
and calling time of death
on a reckless day
if I were a wise and ancient beast
could I lay claim to be anything
or be a menace to be slain?
The truth evades my lips
crashes through my fingertips
lands on the frozen ground
desire is all for naught
checking hours and drawing lots
see the good intentions out
if I emerged from the sea
would I have learned something
or would I cough my lungs out?
Once I wrote
a treaty to the encroaching cold
word by word
fragmented and hardly ever heard
Shaking, signed my name
addressed the errors that remained
I was almost brave
self-inflicted war
let the opposition learn
what the bargain’s for
if I built a terrible machine
would it make a terror out of me?
I can’t see any other way
No, I wouldn’t want to be powerful
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28. |
Given Up
05:22
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|
It’s always getting colder in my head
don’t you recognize?
The thread pulling from both sides
until it falls apart
I’m always in my head
don’t you recognize
the fever in my eyes?
I am shooting daggers
had a happy life
figured out
but the middle of the forest
is the one that I am calling from
(I haven’t left the wilderness yet)
hungry for the truth
couldn’t stomach it
I must excuse myself from the feast
I cannot seem to keep it down
(you have to let yourself rest)
the weather never changes
quite enough to warm me up
and all does is change
I’ve given up
I guess it should be expected
from a collection of bad habits
still, I can’t believe it happened
(I thought you were standing guard)
I’ve given up
maybe I got distracted
disappointing, but it happens
still, I can’t believe it happened
I thought you were standing guard
I’m trying not to feign
sincerity
but it’s a conversation I have am not
equipped to handle
(come inside, you’re soaking wet)
I’m terrified if I dry off
I’ll keep persisting
are you telling me there’s no such thing as closure?
(you have to learn, it doesn’t exist)
|
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29. |
I Will Die Three Deaths
03:42
|
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|
I will die three deaths
One I’ve already met
One when I truly pass
And one when I am forgotten
I will die three deaths
And at least one life of regret
But hopefully two half-lived
So I can make a whole out of it
And when I found I can’t escape the sound of my voice
I was disappointed
A pseudonym spoken like a hymn
To heal myself, disjointed
I will die three deaths
And not dwell on any one of them
And until the next
Try and make progress
And where I find I’ve wasted my time, I wonder
If that is dying too
And if so then my time to go couldn’t be
Anything but soon
“Anticipation” is the wrong word, but I’m prepared to.
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30. |
Hoarfrost
08:15
|
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|
I’m not afraid
Of the endless days,
One eye open as I float along
The surface keeping guard,
And I hope I’m wrong,
That I terrorize every eye I’m put upon,
And I wonder what it is you see,
A core beyond the pageantry.
At this point I might be
A relegated curiosity,
An oddity from your past,
Would you look at me?
“Would you look at that!”
Hoarfrost in the morning,
Surely some must die,
Freezing over overnight,
But I’ll donate my warmth and
My hands will keep you safe,
The cold will wither while we wait,
But surely some must die,
But surely some must die,
But surely some must die,
How do they handle it?
But surely some must die,
But surely some must die,
How do I handle it?
You are casting shadows with your blood,
I see them when I plunge,
If I can smell you in the ocean,
Then they can smell you in the ocean,
Eliminate the feeble consciousness
That gave me confidence to kill,
Instinct over will,
Diamond against diamond you are
Merciful, I will
Grab you in my jaws to hold you.
I will grab you in my jaws to hold you,
But blood seeps through my jaws when I hold you.
|
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31. |
Bury
04:30
|
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|
I want to bury in you,
To steal what sustains you,
I want to bury in you,
And move on when I'm full,
I want to bury in you,
It doesn't really matter,
I want to bury in you,
What sustenance I'm after.
With innocence,
There's a mess to be made.
I want to bury in you,
And it's because I'm jealous,
I want to bury in you,
Of everything you have,
I want to bury in you,
At least I'm being honest,
I want to bury in you,
Take solace in the fact.
With innocence,
There's a mess to be made.
I want to bury in you,
I want to bury in you,
I want to bury in you,
I want (I want).
|
||||
32. |
Magnetic North
03:22
|
|||
|
Holding out a compass in the wrong direction
Trying to find the right things in reverse
The other way was pointing nowhere
The other way was pointing nowhere
And I know nowhere isn’t home
I know nowhere isn’t home
I’ve been there
Trying hard not to read the future
Because I know there’s blank pages at the end
And maybe some in the middle
And maybe some in the middle
And I know the middle is my own
I know the middle is my own
I’ve been there
|
||||
33. |
Falling Up The Stairs
06:13
|
|||
|
Falling up the stairs,
Heaven's heavy-handed,
Today, it's theirs.
Necessity's a chore,
Tools to break the stone,
Dust to settle down ,
Resting on you now.
I would gladly
Give away
My prospective legacy,
Atomized, brutalized, and weak.
I would gladly give away
My untethered urgency,
Cast adrift, waiting to reply,
Until I die.
Sitting in the dark,
Hope is often slaughtered before it starts,
Unremembered dreams,
An unearned fondness for everything.
The math I did would bore
You to sleep, I patiently keep score
Of tired nights and hours that should be yours.
I would gladly give away
My propensity to contemplate
For a second of just solace or a night's sleep.
I would gladly give away
My disproportionate ache
Behind my chest, the first to guess
Gets to open up and see
Me.
|
||||
34. |
Tempest
04:44
|
|||
|
the past is a grotesque
a sink for forgiveness
I am up to my ankles
because nobody told me
what form to be forging
and I don’t wanna find out
the wrong way
that I sculpted out my worst mistakes
the medium is the message I’m afraid
and I wrote it all down
it’s a fever pitch
I won’t let go of it
I want my knuckles
white and raw
and I won’t forget what I saw but
I will try to be kind
I will try to be kind
if the soil will let me
I will try to be kind
I will try to be kind
if the salt will let me
the future’s a protest
young and reckless
bittersweet I forgot
how it felt
I’ve been knee deep in the trenches myself
sustained injuries for all the good it did me
and I don’t wanna find out
the wrong way
that I have passed the point beyond decay
ruthless, standing tall, and brutish
best left in the sun to fade
it was meaningless to try
I wasted half my life on
stories to be told
but I’ll be curious til I go cold
so
I will try to be kind
I will try to be kind
if the soil will let me
I will try to be kind
I will try to be kind
if the salt will let me
tempest crawled to land from out the sea
what a clever thing to be
tempest took to air from out the sea
what a feathered thing
what a clever thing
to be
but try to be kind
|
||||
35. |
Push (Bonus)
03:30
|
|||
|
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARDER
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARDER
I AM THE SUIT OF ARMOR
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARD
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARDER
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARDER
WHY ELSE WOULD I BOTHER?
I WANT TO PUSH YOU HARD.
THIS IS SUCH A TERRIBLE WASTE
TAKE A LOOK AROUND
THERE ARE PEOPLE STARVING
WHILE YOU’RE STUFFING YOUR MOUTH
THIS IS AN INCREDIBLE PACE
WE ARE NOW EN ROUTE
TO INTERSECT WITH OUR BODIES
AS THEY HIT THE GROUND
|
||||
36. |
Medicine (Bonus)
05:04
|
|||
|
WHEN I’VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU
I WILL TILL YOU IN THE SOIL
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO CODIFY
THE FUNGUS THAT YOUR BODY CIRCUMSCRIBES
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO CODIFY
THE ORGANS AS THEY BECOME ATOMIZED
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO WITNESS THIS
INDIGNATION WRAPPED AROUND A FIST
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO WITNESS THIS
A CIRCUMSTANCE WHERE YOU DO NOT EXIST
GET USED TO IT
HOW DARLING IS THE TASTE
OF MEDICINE WE MAKE?
WHEN I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU
I WILL FEED YOU TO THE BEAST
WHEN I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU
I WILL FEED YOU TO THE BEAST
SO WE CAN ALL EAT
WHEN I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU
I WILL FEED YOU TO THE BEAST
WHEN I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU
I WILL FEED YOU TO THE LOVE WITH YOU
SO WE CAN ALL EAT
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO COMMANDEER
THE VEHICLE PILOTED BY YOUR FEAR
THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO COMMANDEER
THE SHIP THAT WRECKED AND STRANDED US BOTH HERE
THERE WILL BE NOTHING TO SACRIFICE
THE LIGHT’S ALREADY LEFT FROM BOTH OUR EYES
THERE WILL BE NOTHING TO SACRIFICE
A PRESENT THAT WAS NEVER WORTH THE PRICE
I DON’T WANNA FEEL BAD
I DON’T EVER WANNA FEEL BAD
|
||||
37. |
||||
|
I WOULD TRY ANYTHING
TO HASTEN THE CLIPPING OF YOUR WINGS
TERRIBLE TO DISGUISE MY GRACE
MADNESS IN THE MIDDLE DISTANCE
ELEGANT REPRISE IN THE DIRTIEST FACE
MADNESS IN THE MIDDLE DISTANCE
I’M HERE NOW
FAMILIAR WITH THE SWORD
FAMILIAR WITH THE SWORD
I AM READY TO DENY
ASSIGNATION OF ANY TYPE
I AM THE RUPTURED LUNG
I CORRUPTED EVERY TONGUE
I AM FOUND LOOSE IN DIRT
SEPARATED BIRTH FROM BIRTH
AND SPEECH FROM SPEECH
SO SPEAK TO ME
I SPUN A HATEFUL ORBIT IN MY CELL
A CACKLE IN A TALE TO TELL TO TELL THE TALE TO TAKE THE FALL TO HELL AND WAIT FOR SOIL TO SING AND SWORDS TO BRING THE FALL
FOR ANYTHING AT ALL
CLIPPING WINGS AND USELESS THINGS
RATTLE AT THE BOTTOM OF YOUR CAGE
AND BEG FOR FEED
|
||||
38. |
||||
|
I have had a nosebleed every day since you died
and I don’t think that it means anything.
Pathetic in a way I have criticized others for
feeling guilty for laughing or not laughing
for worrying or not worrying
for resting or working
rushing to write things down
time is so corrosive now
I’m starting to forget the way things worked
it was all too simple
the muscle memory
atrophies away
until there’s a day where I am happy but I don’t think of your face
I wish it was uncertain but it’s not
Billions of years
I have had a nosebleed every day since you died
and I know it doesn’t mean anything.
Casually endangering myself
not looking before crossing the road
as cosmic protest to a cosmology I don’t accept
call it “soft suicide”
but i’m scared that I’ll never die
or that I’ll die tomorrow
and nothing in-between
it just feels so useless
to progress
knowing slates are wiping clean
and even if I see the future
I won’t know what it means.
|
||||
39. |
Dredgs (Bonus)
03:37
|
|||
|
Funny how it all shakes out
a shaggy dog that shames its owner
middle of the traffic, middle of the day
you can tell where you are by the color of the lines
I am where I’ve always been
a beggar on a palanquin
I shaved my head and no one asked
if this is midlife crisis cope shit but it is
I can get away with most
of my self-destruction if I do it quietly
everyone is working, middle of the day
and I had a panic attack for no reason
I think it was the coffee?
I am using every part of the animal
the flesh is “discontent,” the meat is “content”
and I am drowning in its blood
and strangers’ compliments
and emails from enthusiastic organizations
I am interested but I am tired
from stepping over corpses of the recently dead
I know that is nonsense, in the middle of the day
but knowing that it’s nonsense isn’t helpful when night falls
It has been a week since I
had a nosebleed, which I was using to mark days
a ritual calendar that I was using to atone
a modicum of pain that no one could fault me for
the dregs of this
will persist
long beyond
their usefulness
as if they already haven’t yet
I am turning circumspect
a hermit who doesn’t want to leave the cave
but I want so bad to show you what I’ve made
but still you can’t come in
the dregs of this
will persist
long beyond
their usefulness
as if they already haven’t yet
|
||||
40. |
||||
|
It’s a bust
the dumbing down of love
and grief and hate
for the sake of song
has made fools of us.
It is not
for making into art
we have been cruel
I apologize
for what it is I do
and I am doing
it’s a trick but
we have torn the flesh
and there’s no mending
we pride ourselves on pointing out
what it is we broke
it’s too much
ankle deep in shit
and still I’m thinking
how lovely it will be
once I have made a piece of art
my art isn’t worth it
recycled sound
you’re used to it by now
a crutch
I’m breaking windows quickly
there’s no time
to wrap my hand
in disgust
you’re right to point it out
there is sausage to be made
there are deals to be discussed
in the dark
the now and final dark
there’s a place where it is warm
and I don’t have to think so much
I forget
the strangest little things
I love you
and a song can only drag that through the mud
|
||||
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